Planning a Wedding

Every time I think, Hey I don't have anything to write about I might as well close my blog Something comes up to write about.

My daughter announced her engagement a couple of weeks ago and I find myself smack dab in the middle of planning a wedding.

I didn't have a big wedding, so this is all new to me. I knew about the basics, Brides family pays for this Grooms family pays for that..but I didn't know all the extras. Present for parents, present for groom (I always thought the Bride was the present to the groom?) etc etc etc. So I am in for a year of new adventures, the least being spending two days looking at brides magazine and getting sticker shock on wedding dress prices. Seriously who pays 15,000 for a dress you can wear one day? Seriously?

so now I have new blog ideas, I started homeschooling Tasha which will be another set of adventures. All will keep me busy and hopefully a laugh for all of you.

Father's Day and small talk six

This Sunday is the day we honor fathers for their commitment to family, for love of their kids and commitment to the mothers of their children. Fathers Day. I never knew my father very well. I lived with my Grandmother, strangely enough HIS mother. I still did not see him terribly often. Every few years he would come riding into town, promising he was going to stay, always with a new "mommy" for me.When I was young, this was exciting, as I grew, I began to understood what was happening.

My father was a roamer. He could not stay in one place. When I grew up I went from angry to angrier.

Why did he not  care about me? Why did he not want to be with me?

My mother had abandoned me summarily. It was not until I was 17 I even met her.

At least my dad came by once every few years. Still, I am not sure what was worse the hit and run visits or just never knowing where my mom was.
I am grown up and looking back I realized some things.

The most notable was my father gave all he could. He had serious issues of his own life to work through, and handling the issues in my life then he could handle.

I wish I had realized it before he died.

Everyperson who enters you life leaves an impression on it. Of course, my father then, but more then that, he left me a resolve. Never to abandon anyone I love and to understand other frailties.

I know now so..Happy Fathers Day, Dad I forgive you.

There weren't many things both my Dad and I enjoyed. together.but I can think of Six


1. When he was around he used to like to take me out to eat. I never got to because my grandmother couldn't afford it. I still like to eat out..but more important it was the only time I was ever alone with him and felt special.


2. Reading. He loved to Read. I do as well.


3. Sports


4. Classical musical 


5. Chicago Hot Dogs I was born there and for most of his life he lived their until moving to Detroit. There still isn't a dog to cover the Chicago Hot dog.


6. Travel. I want to he always did, but never stayed in a job long enough to earn the money to do much. I like to think his travels were his roaming. He saw a lot of America. Still, we used to talk about going to Europe someday. He was always going to hit it "big" and take me all over the world. That's it. We shared a dream. Even though I knew deep inside it was never to be, I hope he believed it. We all have to have hope. 


Visit MomDot and see some other wonderful blogs about Fathers and Daughters.

Beautiful Thinga Happen

Today is my youngest daughters birthday. It should be a happy dy, but it isn't. It isn't because we are celebrating her birthday here, she is celebrating with Jesus.

It took me a minute to remember God was in control, and although this is the worst thing to happen to me, being in heaven has to be the best thing for her.

Sheila Walsh's book put me in perspective about a lot of things, mostly how to remember to trust God.

Did you ever question God’s ability to catch you when you fail? Do Shame, fear and brokeness keep you from fully trusting God. Do you secretly believe your dreams are unreachable? You are not alone.

And so starts the Journey of Sheila Walsh, sharing how she battled her way from depression with faith and love for her Lord.

Sheila shares some very personal experiences of her life in Darkness and light, and how she overcame.

Then shows us through the teaching of Tabitha, David, Paul and others who teach us that in spite of overwhelming

circumstances just one trusting encounter with Christ puts beautiful things in motion. And as she does this she draws a parallel between her life and theirs. I have never personally compared my life to a Biblical character and myself, but the way she did it brought a new revelation in how the Bible affects us. So often we read it as a third person instead of God giving us examples of our own lives.

When I walked away with this new revelation, it gave me a much more personal and closer feeling to the Characters in the Bible.

The book itself is masterfully  written, with  personal insight and compassion. I could feel her pain and triumph.

I recommend this book highly to everyone who has ever suffered the darkness, whether you are going through it or are have come out, damaged. It is a reminder of the one who is in control.

It is the story of our lives, and how He has promised us we will overcome. Sheila shows us He is worthy of the trust we put in Him. He is definitely in control.

of Choices, Disasters and Love

I love disaster movies. Hurricanes, Tornado's, Earthquakes, Bugs, you name it I watch them. I once spent a whole weekend watching Sci Fi  channel's disaster special. It had the attack of every bug you could think of, and then some. 

If you watch as many as I have you begin to realize how predictable they are. There is always the person (the star usually) who discovers the problem and tries to warn the president or someone that the problem is coming. 

The big guy of course doesn't want to spend the money or panic the world so he denies it and goes on. Then there is the guy or gal who believes in the good guy because they are in love, usually married separated or dating and separated, because the whole idea of the movie is for them to realize they are really in love and need to reunite. they always survive. You know that from the beginning, else how would they get back together. Oh yes, one has to save the other. Then of course there is the great great great aunt, cousin old friend or mother in law who stays in her home because its her home, dag nab it! and I ain't leavin.

Got the picture. OK open movie guide, insert title and there you have it! Your plot, your characters, just name your disaster. 

Isn't it to bad life isn't like that? I remember my grandmother  telling me one day, 

"Honey, the one that misses you is not the one to worry about,"  How true.

Life is full of choices. I have made many good, many more bad.But don't we all?

It would seem our minus usually outweigh our pluses, but if we look closely enough sometime good comes out of the minus', if only that we learned a hard lesson. 

My very first truly serious boyfriend was after I returned to California after college. He gave me a ticket on my way to work. Yes, he was a cop, uh er, police officer.

The next day, he stopped me because my rear tire was low. OK.

The third day he  stopped me because he didn't see my sticker, oops there it was.

The fourth day, I asked him why he was harassing me, and he said:

"Don't you know?' 

"Nope, can't imagine."

"Because we are going to get married."

"okay, well if that's the case I should probably know your name don't you think?"

And so started for me, the first great romance of my life. It still effects me today.

It's funny when I think, I wasn't scared at all. Back then, Policeman were authority figures, and you just weren't afraid of them.

But even then it took ten more stops, 10 days for him to convince me he was serious. 

On the last day he just said:

"Enough of this, time we went out."

I asked him where, and what he would do if I didn't go out with him, and he said San Francisco was where and he would arrest me until I said yes. 

I went. 

And so began I know the greatest relationship of my life, but two weeks before we were going to get marrieds, He was killed in a car accident while on duty. 

Choices.  If I had made any other choice, it would have cost me 15 months that I would not have traded for anything. My friend wrote a blog on about Choices, which makes a interesting commentary some of the choices we make.

The second choice I made a few months later was simply and purely rebounding. I tried to get out of it several times then gave in. I should have listened to my bells and whistles. We were married for 25 years, no abuse, or anything, just... nothing. 

Well I can't say nothing, three beautiful children, and that's where the good comes in, for even with bad choices, something good happens. This relationship still haunts my life, I still look for him in everyone. This makes my online dating experience a little harder and does not make it easy for the gentleman I am talking to. I need to stop this. I need to make my choices based on reality not past. I need to take my lumps, not creat my own disaster movie.

As my mother and the whole world says: 

Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger. 

And that, I believe is the story of all choices.