Saturday, June 19, 2010

Father's Day and small talk six

This Sunday is the day we honor fathers for their commitment to family, for love of their kids and commitment to the mothers of their children. Fathers Day. I never knew my father very well. I lived with my Grandmother, strangely enough HIS mother. I still did not see him terribly often. Every few years he would come riding into town, promising he was going to stay, always with a new "mommy" for me.When I was young, this was exciting, as I grew, I began to understood what was happening.

My father was a roamer. He could not stay in one place. When I grew up I went from angry to angrier.

Why did he not  care about me? Why did he not want to be with me?

My mother had abandoned me summarily. It was not until I was 17 I even met her.

At least my dad came by once every few years. Still, I am not sure what was worse the hit and run visits or just never knowing where my mom was.
am grown up and looking back I realized some things.

The most notable was my father gave all he could. He had serious issues of his own life to work through, and handling the issues in my life then he could handle.

I wish I had realized it before he died.

Everyperson who enters you life leaves an impression on it. Of course, my father then, but more then that, he left me a resolve. Never to abandon anyone I love and to understand other frailties.

know now so..Happy Fathers Day, Dad I forgive you.

There weren't many things both my Dad and I enjoyed. together.but I can think of Six

1. When he was around he used to like to take me out to eat. I never got to because my grandmother couldn't afford it. I still like to eat out..but more important it was the only time I was ever alone with him and felt special.

2. Reading. He loved to Read. I do as well.

3. Sports

4. Classical musical 

5. Chicago Hot Dogs I was born there and for most of his life he lived their until moving to Detroit. There still isn't a dog to cover the Chicago Hot dog.

6. Travel. I want to he always did, but never stayed in a job long enough to earn the money to do much. I like to think his travels were his roaming. He saw a lot of America. Still, we used to talk about going to Europe someday. He was always going to hit it "big" and take me all over the world. That's it. We shared a dream. Even though I knew deep inside it was never to be, I hope he believed it. We all have to have hope. 

Visit MomDot and see some other wonderful blogs about Fathers and Daughters.

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